Sneaking a keg in.

I have never uttered the phrase “snuck in a keg”. Which is a shame, because something about two guys in frayed ballcaps and polo shirts trying to covertly tiptoe through a living room holding a huge metal 150 pound barrel filled with liquid really appeals to me.

Also, there’s the logistics of 90 people all conveniently gathered on the patio. Could you imagine walking on that balcony and not knowing what’s going on?

“Why are all these people out here? It’s freezing, but all their jackets are lying right over there in that pile. And let me say, you guys brought some THICK jackets. That pile’s like 4 feet high! And, it’s also weird that you guys all have those big red plastic cups… you know we have no beer here. And Derrick - how come you were doing a handstand over the jacket pile? Was that another one of your -look what I used to do as a gymnast - type show off moves? Oh Derrick… this is just like when I came back for Thanksgiving, and saw you spilled all that baby powder on the coffee table. What? Of course the jackets are dry… what good would they be if they were wet? Now, where’d you guys get all that apple cider?”